Shitty stuff being balanced out with good stuff. Puncture wound, blood all over the shrimp, a big black moth that attacks me, but then Ariel calls. But today, oh, what can make up for today?

I have never felt such woe: Mitch Hedberg cancelled his appearance. When the club called me to ask if I wanted to cancel our tickets or see whoever they found as a replacement, I was very calm. I channelled every scrap of adult behavior I possess and did not start crying and whining like a baby. I was strong. I told them to cancel our reservations. I stifled a sob as I hung up the phone.

Considering that this was the second thing to happen to me after I awoke -- the first being a juice glass breaking in my hand -- I think I need to be rewarded, I need to be consoled. Preferably with cash donations.